Hubby has seemed down the past couple weeks. Just always tired and distant and with a shorter fuse than normal. Money things especially seemed to set him off, and it got me thinking...maybe he feels I'm pushing him too hard with this Money Makeover thing I've roped us into? Maybe he thinks that money is all I care about?

So last night I asked him whether something was wrong. And I got the usual answer about work being hard right now, but he also slipped in a single sentence about being worried he wouldn't get the promotion he should have coming next month. The one we've been looking forward to and planning for all year. The one I have financial forecast spreadsheets already built around. And I thought, hmmm, I haven't heard him say that before. Could this fear be behind the mood of late?

So I probed a bit further. And here's where I'll have to back up a bit and give you some detail on his work situation. Hubby works for a large fortune 500 company that has a policy of testing out new managers by generally giving them a small team to work with for a year and then officially promoting them (ie pay grade level raise) and expanding their team the following year if all goes well. Hubby started out last March with a team of 3 underneath him. One who turned out to be a rock star, one who's your average joe schmo, and one who is the devil incarnate.

His boss told him he was getting a lemon who was transferred to them because she had issues with her last manager already (and the one before that, and...) but he wanted him to see what he could do with her. He had no idea what was really in store. I can't even begin to go in to everything this woman did, it would just go on forever. All I will say is that she knew how to work the system of a large company, knew how to complicate things further with unverifiable health issues, and had the entire human resource department involved in her case besides themselves with dread. For hubby, this meant headache after headache as he jumped through all the hoops and appeals of the employee corrective action process, the end result being that something/someone which should have been maybe 10% the focus of his job became more like 60%. She was going to be out of his hair soon (more on that in a bit) but the months prior had taken their toll.

So hubby was concerned about his promotion status. He knew he had accomplished less in other areas than he would have without that situation. He knew his direct supervisor felt he was doing very well given the situation, but he didn't know who all needed to approve the promotion and he didn't know what criteria they would be using to evaluate that decision. And he knew how much I had been looking forward to that money. About my spreadsheets. About my assumptions. And he silently worried. Poor hubby.

It has been a long, tight few months for our budget since back child support ended in Dec, my home business floundered all Summer/Fall, the car broke down big time, and Xmas arrived. And that was all just after we had started getting our feet wet with this debt reduction stuff to begin with! It helped a lot during that time that hubby's hobby was steadily earning him some initially unexpected income as well. I kind of made it clear to him though that for Dec and Jan at least, as great as it was that he was getting paid for something he loved, we really needed the money as well. Although it had started out that way, it wasn't really optional anymore - at least not for those two months. He didn't like the fun that took out of it for him, though he understood the constraints we were under and he did what he needed to do to make that happen. With everything going on at work as well though, I think it was all just too much for him.

So, I've done my best to back off set his heart at ease. I reassured him that now that my business has picked up again, we don't need that money anymore, and if he stopped making another penny of it, it would only set us back two months in our debt plan. I also told him that whether or not his company is able to recognize his efforts this year, given the ridiculous situation he was put in, I know he did an amazing job with what he had to work with and in one more year without her in the picture, he was going to knock their socks off. And I truly believe this. My hubby is a very capable and competent man that is really good at what he does. It was just a crappy situation.

I think he felt some relief from that. I think he was happy to know I did care about more than just the money, though I think I need to work even harder in the future to make sure he knows that. It's just so much a focus of mine right now as we work through all this debt. I think he felt down right elated this morning though when he came in to find her letter or resignation in his inbox. Truthfully, she was finally on a final warning and it was really only a matter of time one way or another, but that was probably the best outcome possible. Additionally, his boss mentioned at a team meeting later that day that all requests for promotions have been initially approved - and he knows he's one of them.

Its been a good day.